Well, here is our second blog! My goal was for one a month, but having two children in therapy for SPD and a foundation to run, keeps me a little behind – and I know that many of you live like I do!
The holiday season is fast approaching, giving parents of children with SPD much to think (and worry!) about. The school structured routines change, often with the last week before the break including more ‘fun time’ and less ‘learning time’. For most children, this is a dream come true. For our children, the lack of a visual schedule, or not knowing what is coming next, presents excruciating stress each and every day.
For those of you who may not be aware of how this feels, allow me to provide an example. Next week take away all your calendars, daytimers, schedulers, etc. Go to work each day without knowing what your day is going to be like, who you will see, and what you have to accomplish. During the day, add singing loud Christmas carols, eating foods that cause hypersensitivity, and then for more fun, add a Christmas concert performance.
As adults, we forget how stressful the season is for all children – and especially so for children with SPD. During an emergency on an airplane, the parent is told take the oxygen first so that they are able to save their child’s life. The same applies with busy holiday times. If we want our children to remain as calm as possible in this fast paced, over exceeded expectations, season, we must remember to K.I.S. - Keep it simple!
Ask your child’s teacher for a program of what the week before school finishes will be like, so you can add more visuals to your child’s schedule. Or go over it at home, and ask the teacher to remind your child of the ‘new’ schedule and what the day will involve.
And for family outings...ah yes...family outings - use the same strategy - K.I.S. In our home, we have fewer people coming to visit at one time, and always take a day off after a visit to allow our children twenty-four hours to regulate their nervous systems. My mom always said “you kids were great the first day of company but by the next day if you weren’t out playing in the snow, you would all get so grumpy!” Hmmm - sensory seeking perhaps? Or needing some proprioception? Now, we have often have family gatherings around a toboggan hill or a skating rink. This allows us to visit without the television on, people talking loudly, smells of food heightening sensitivities, rooms too hot, and too itchy, uncomfortable “fancy Christmas” clothes.
If you just have to do a family function, remember - only one family in the morning and the other in the evening. Try being the last to arrive and the first to leave. No matter how much you feel the need to stay longer and talk with the adults, your child’s disability, even though hidden, must be respected. Make sure to bring heavy winter clothing so you can take a break and go for a walk or to the nearest playground. I am often reminded of a friend who has a child with severe allergies and asthma. Everyone in her family is so supportive and they make their visits small and short and sweet. They all love this little girl so much and will do all they can to not hurt her just because they want to see her. Mom and Dad are so good about saying what her needs are and asking the family for help in supporting her. The whole family comes up with solutions. The respect you show your child’s SPD is often the model other family members will follow. And perhaps we all need to K.I.S.!
I have included a list of gifts that seem to be great for SPD kids, depending, of course, on the age and abilities of your child. I hope there is something that fits for your family!
There are also couple of websites you might want to check for other ideas.
These are only a few – you can ‘Google’ ‘sensory toys’ for more.
We have had to be very careful as we are a single income family and could not afford some of the higher end products. We went for cheaper, which sometimes caused safety issues if the products broke easily, were found to have lead based paint or were recalled. This Christmas, we gave a list to our family with one or two of the more expensive toys highlighted, and with the suggestion that gift givers pool their money rather than giving a number of small gifts. This will have a much greater benefit for our children.
To date the items that we have used the most have been the platform swing and system from Southpaw, Lycra swing and body sock from Innoviad, tire tubes...provided by Dad, and a two Yoga balls that go everywhere with us.
From Sensory Processing Disorder Canada, our special group of board members and my family and I, may you all have a peaceful, simple holiday season. May 2009, bring you awareness, empowerment, and a sense of connection with your beautiful, sensitive, intelligent, children. Take time to celebrate who they are and do not focus on what society is saying they are not.
Seasons Greetings,
Lori Fankhanel
President
SPD Canada Foundation